Colonel Terminated/ The Mettelsome Mr. Zero

Well the mission actually went alot quicker than I thought it would. I snuck up on the colonel and beheaded him, effectively terminating his command with extreme prejudice. I went back and tried to rejoin my comrades on the sanpan, but the villagers quickly caught sight of me from the shore and began to protest. They hurled rocks and spears at us, and cursed us in their native tongue. We returned fire and the villagers quickly scattered. This nonsense with the villagers is starting to get out of control, and it will soon be time to take off the kiddie gloves.


I was somewhat preoccupied with murdering the tax collector and quelling the insipid village uprisings, I still managed to catch some major league baseball action. And frankly I don't know what to do with the meddling "Mr. Zero"...



Shingo Takatsu...AKA "Mr. Zero"

Mr. Zero, no relation to the WWII fighter aircraft, has been submarining grapefruits to major league batters for far too long. He gave up three dongs in one inning to the lowly Cleveland Indians last week. It was the first time in their long and troubled history that the Indians mustered three ninth inning homeruns. Today it appeared Mr. Zero was finally gone, but he replaced Damaso Marte to procure the final out as the surging White Sox marched on. My god it is an embarrassment to have this nitwit Takatsu take the mound for a save opportunity. If Ozzie Guillen won't remove Takatsu, I'll take matters into my own hands.